Drake is cool or whatever, if you're into that kind of things. People are still really hype about "Back to Back," and that's cool. People are still asking Meek "is that your tour or your girl's tour?" I mean Drake isn't on tour anyway, he's got nothing to do but out disses. Does it really matter who's tour it is? One thing is for sure, it's not Drakes. The best version of "Back to Back," isn't Drake's either. Here's 5 versions better than his.
Freddy Kruegar - Back to Back
Freddy kind of lost in Freddy vs Jason. He's still a little salty about it and Jason was running off at the mouth. It's only right Freddy responded with some bars. It was heating up like that furnace room where he used to molest kids and got burned alive. I'm not joking, Freddy is a pedophile. But yeah, Jason got these bars and it was a nightmare he couldn't wake up from. Get it, because Freddy kills people in their dreams.
Barack Obama (Alphacat) - Back to Back
Donald Trump sucks, Obama is kind of awesome. A real American hero vs a reality TV star. What happens when Obama grabs the mic and responds. Well he murders trump 16 bars at a time. The disses were coming back to back, like Obama's terms. He said:
back to back, like Trump's divorces.How's that for defending the sanctity of marriage? This is the most political diss since Ludacris dropped "Politics as Usual."
Ar-Ab - Back 2 Back
Okay, jokes aside, let's get to the serious shit. Ar-Ab is a rapper from Philadelphia who has collaborated with Meek Mill in the past. In the original "Back to Back" Drake mentioned Ar-Ab. This caused him to enjoy the shout out and Meek felt disrespected, so Ar-Ab got them twitter fingers. The thing is, Ar-Ab has never even met Drake. Drake just mentioned him because he knew it would annoy Meek and it did.
The thing is, Ar-Ab isn't one to take this sitting down, especially when he could be considered a local rapper before this, and promptly headed to the studio to drop his own bars on the track. It's full of inside references to growing up with Meek, gangsters in Philly, Meek paying protection fees and plenty of the most disrespectful bars that Meek has eaten in his career. Here's a few excerpts:
Why you diss me, need to diss Drake, that nigga killed you, First 48
I heard Nicki fucked you with a strap on
Nigga you a pussy put a pad on
I don't understand what the hate be, Drake ate you now you hate meOn the outro of the song it's all summed up nicely:
That boy said my name I don't even know him, I had nothing to do with it man, but you said fuck me well then it's fuck you nigga.
Tyson - Flat to Fact
I gave up on B.O.B. a long time ago if you remember. Now Bobby is doing twitter rants about how The Earth is flat. The realest astrophysicist alive Neil deGrasse Tyson attempted to school Bobby. However Bobby was bugging out and did not want to hear it. Instead Bobby went to the studio and recorded a diss track aimed at NDT called "Flatline." It featured hard hitting lines like:
Neil Tyson need to loosen up his vest, they'll probably write that man one hell of a checkI'm lying, there were no hard hitting bars. Just conspiracy theories about how the holocaust didn't really happen and Jewish people secretly ruling the world. B.O.B. is really out of his mind. See what I did there because he has a song called "Out of My Mind." Anyway NDT stated he doesn't rap, but he knows a rapper who has his back.
This is when his nephew and rapper Tyson shows up. Like most people I have never heard of Tyson before but damn did he make his way into the rap scene with a big bang. See what I did there, because The Big Bang...nothing? Anyway he drops a response to Bobby called "Flat to Fact" and it is one of the funniest things I've heard in a long time. I couldn't stop laughing. Here are some selected lyrics of the verbal assault:
You the Donkey of the Day, I ain't waitin for Charlamagne, all them strange clouds must be messin' with your brain
I think it's very clear, that Bobby didn't read enough, and he's believing all this conspiracy theory stuff. Are these all of your thoughts or is the loud talkin, I'm a high flyer, but you must be cloud walking
Guitar strings turn to Twitter things
I could make another one and then another one, the DJ Khaled of teaching Bobby about the sun
I mean, please, check him for a wire or an earpiece, please, is Donald Trump the one that's feeding you all of these, stupid bits of information keeps you on your knees, I know we got a freedom of speech, but Bobby please, somebody stop this, or call the Drop Squad because they got this, and maybe they can pick up Stacy Dash too
If that wasn't bad enough the next day NDT when on The Nightly Show to drop some bars with Larry Wilmore as a hypeman. Bobby, it's over.
Sauce Walka - Wack 2 Wack
Kanye's new album may be called Waves but nobody rides waves better than Drake. Admit or not he's what people like to call a hype beast or a swagger jacker. Sauce Walka called him out for stealing the sound of Texas music, specifically Houston and never doing songs with artists he's stealing from. To be fair Drake did several songs with Bun B but that was only because he basically stole the beat for "Uptown," from Bun and Big Bun Beater don't play that.
How did Drake respond to accusations of swagger jacking and hype beasting in the 1st degree? He got on stage and did Sauce Walka's Drip dance, claiming it as his own. That was it. Sauce Walka had enough and immediately headed to the studio to fire back at Drake. Luckily for us, he did it on Drake's beat and damn, it was one of the most amazing lyrical decompositions of a human being recorded in history. Of course I have some excerpts but I'm tempted to post lyrics to the whole damn song and do annotations:
I don't want to hear I'm picking on this nigga again
I knew the first day we met that we could never be friends, cause you a motherfucking bitch, you a clown ass actor
Old geek ass nigga like "What is that, syrup?" at Treasures spending your money on these bitches, little perv, and I ain't talking bout dancers, you was paying for pussy, I was pimping so I knew about that shit, little rookie
You was too busy fucking Jhonni Blaze bare skin, uhhhhhhh buddy got that hot dick, tried to keep it secret but Lil Blaze had them hot lips
What kinda man let another man pee on him? And you kissed Madonna after everybody peed on her
Damn, creators turned impersonators, you got a whole ghost writer handing you the paper, what happened to the rap game built off of greatness, now-a-days this shit built off of fakeness
Since when is it cool to use steroids
Y'all tryna say that this nigga's a rap god, nah lil bitch, you a rap fraud, you used to draw Digimons and Pokemons, and draw lil dicks on the paper, you super bad
Your bitch stiffer than you, she'll whoop your ass, don't piss off Serena before she turn you to Tina
When you was in Houston, I pulled up at Del Frisco's, with them shooters with me and y'all was real nervous, I came to the dinner table, real urgent, that whole weekend, I had you around the city sneaking, you missed about three shows that weekendDamn Drake, get it together. You ain't doing shit right now anyway.
You can hear Darrell on the CP Time and Powerbomb Jutsu podcasts. He also plays classic arcade games on The CabinetFollow @OriginalKingD
You can also hear Jordan on the CP Time Podcast and follow along with his Ultimate Team in Madden 16.
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