Deku is Trash

Trash hugging trash. Perhaps this is Deku's dad?

1. That quirk isn't his, none of them are.

2. This one is for the finger he broke throwing a baseball.

3. Deku means "useless" and that's the name he chose.

4. Imagine being saved by a hero who's name translates to "person who can't do anything," doesn't that make you feel so much better?

5. Deku also translates to puppet, which makes sense because he's being used as a puppet by All Might to destroy All for One.

6. Dude barely made it through the entrance exam, who did All Might have to bribe?

7. Does this guy have any hobbies or interests not related to heroes? Retirement is going to hit him hard when Todoroki cleans up all the crime in the country.

8. His only fans are the handful of kids he's saved.

9. Has he ever saved anyone over the age of 18? Dude is a hero for kids and teens. 

10. I don't care if his mom made that costume, it's ugly. The remix is ugly too. What is he supposed to be? A Jackal? A Hyena? You look dumb. You not cool to me, you not tough, you not the measuring stick of what real heroes aspire to be.

11. Mumble, mumble, scribble, scribble, mumblemummaedjaskwdfpjsdfpd

12. You probably think I'm going to say he cries to much, but I'm not. There's nothing wrong with slightly more crying than normal; in fact we should all cry more, especially us men folk. Instead I'm going to talk about how his cooking game is trash and he sucks at playing instruments as well. He can't clean, and he can't draw either. Dude just writes overly detailed reports in his journal. Do you have any non-hero skills?

13. This one is for the entire hand he broke in the sports tournament trying to win a field day participation ribbon.

14. Talk no Jutsu.

15. Dude doesn't even want to be his own unique hero.

16. He wants to be All Might so bad, has he not realized All Might is just all right.

17. Not his quirk, still a normie.

18. If we're real about it, the guy is mad creepy. Teenage boy who hangs out with rapidly aging hero. Considers a rival who has bullied him since they were children his best friend. He doesn't like you, let that toxicity go. Don't save Bakugo, he don't wanna be saved. Dude spent his childhood worshiping a super hero. His parents are still happily married, but dad won't come home? He never took the time to develop in any way other than analyzing heroes. He's got a 10 in intelligence and a 10 in strength but 0 in every other category.

19. How are your hero shoes gonna be the same as your gym shoes, as your school shoes, as your casual shoes as your shoes shoes? He's not even from a poor family. There's no excuse to not own just one more pair of shoes for heroics. Man is just too lazy to care. Nike ain't made for fighting heroes Deku. You gonna jump right through them one day.

20. He can buy more shoes but he spends every dime his mother gives him on All Might Merchandise.

21. You already know this is for other bones he's broken.

22. Dude uses a whip, you know who else used a whip? Indiana Jones, and he stole sacred artifacts from various cultures. Also Hitler used to abuse stray dogs with a whip.

23. His parents are still together but his dad never comes home. Is it because he's ashamed of Deku? Deku why have you shamed your father?

24. This one is for all the other times he had to make out with Recovery Granny. I swear he gets hurt on purpose.

25. What kind of hero can't use his quirk without hurting himself? That's what villains do.

You can check out some of my fiction at 12 AM Fiction or follow my web serial Exsanguinate and of course hear me on the Powerbomb Jutsu podcast.
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